Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Curses!

My life lately has been a series of relatively minor but nonetheless unfortunate events. You may remember such mishaps as the sprained ankle and subsequent emergency room visit on Christmas morning, someone trying to frame me for drug possession, and the letter telling me that I'm deceased. Additionally I've been a total klutz (smashing my glass measuring cup to bits and slamming my head on the car door come to mind, among other household injuries), leading Justin to repeatedly ask, "What is WRONG with you?" Today Marilyn suggested that perhaps I'm cursed. That was before my latest, shall we say, incident.

After work today I picked up Luke and went to get a few things from the grocery store. We got home, I got dinner in the oven, and the phone rang. It was the grocery store, notifying me that they had my purse. I'd left it in the cart. (Sound familiar, Mom?) I didn't even realize I didn't have it. (What is WRONG with me?) So I ran over there to pick it up. Nothing is missing. (Leah, tell Heinz that if anyone wanted to steal my identity, they missed their chance today--I hope.)


Think of each of these events individually, and they seem insignificant. But cumulatively? I can only reach one conclusion. Remember my broken owl from the ornament swap? And how I told Karma to suck it? Perhaps that was ill-advised. Now, I don't believe in that sort of thing, but I must be under a Karma curse. The only other explanation is that I'm an absent-minded klutz. I prefer the curse.


So what do I do? How do I break the cycle? Do I have to make a list and atone for all of my past misdeeds, like Earl?


Don't be ridiculous.


I'm buying a Karma necklace.


Gold or silver? I can't decide.

See, I decided last week that I needed a signature necklace. One I will wear every day. Steph and Nat helped me pick out this one, and I loved it but thought, "I'm not telling anyone it's a Karma necklace. L-ame." Well, scratch that. It is a KARMA NECKLACE. You might think this is a selfish purchase. You're wrong. It's for Karma.

I better pay for expedited shipping.

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would say its time for something! Although you have done nothing to provoke karma, breaking an owl doesn't count in my opinion-it is no black cat. But at this point you must try anything!

Natalie said...

I think you should give the owl ornament to the person you so ruthlessly stole it from. And... do you want the email you wrote me saying, "I am NOT telling anyone it is a Karma necklace." You didn't just think it, I have it. In writing. Oh... one more thing? You are JUST like your mother. (Insert grandma cackle here).

Stephanie said...

OMG, before I saw the end of this post, I totally thought about the necklace and what you said and I was gonna say BUY THE KARMA NECKLACE! Whew. I hope you overnighted it.

Amanda is going to give you a big, fat "I told you so."

Stephanie said...

Oh. Silver, I think.

Or gold. Crap. I'm on a gold kick.

But I mostly almost always go back to silver.

Yeah. Silver.

Robin said...

why is she just like her mother? I don't get that part.

1. I am glad you recognize that you need to atone for the Karma sucks comment.
2. Give the owl to the poor girl who had it first.
3. Silver. you have lots of silver jewelry.
4. It is nice to hear that there are honest people in the world and someone turned in your purse.

Leah said...

I think gold would look good with your coloring, although I'm partial to silver myself.

Katie Bowlby: A Series of Unfortunate Events—coming soon to a bookstore near you.

Anonymous said...

Hurry up with the necklace. Katie I can't tell you how many times I have left my purse or my keys somewhere. Maybe it is genetic. I can hear Grandma laughing. MM

The Bakers said...

I so want a signature necklace of my own! I didn't realize one could ask for help in such matters--I thought it would take away from the "signature" aspect somehow. But now that I know it's OK to get advice, any suggestions for me? Oh, wait, was this post about you?

Anonymous said...

Oh, Katie, I love that necklace - I don't care what it is!! Where do you find it? Online?? Let me know.

P.S. Glad to hear it wasn't just me giving you bad luck (Christmas morning - I totally blamed myself for that one - if only I hadn't wondered where Charlie was, none of that would have happened!). I don't mean I'm glad you're having other bad luck - and you really are - just glad it wasn't all me.

Mom B.

Bonnie said...

Katie, I love your necklace - what a great idea. Hope it helps your karma! I love your blog too. And yes, I've left my purse too. It's genetic, I think.